Children, Beware of Paedophiles!

 Lost in “love”

Boys and girls have become ripe pickings for predatory older men who managed to convince them to run away from home with them – all in the name of “love”.

According to the Police, statistics compiled from 2006 which show 2,175 minors went missing from home. They did so out of desire to run off with their lovers. From the total, 1,076 of the lovelorn runaways were teens aged between 14 and 17. More than 90 percent are girls. Shockingly, 55 of these children were aged between 10 and 13. A nine-year-old girl had fled with her lover in 2006 while a nine-year-old boy did the same in 2009.

Due to pressures at home, children would seek solace in friends of the “wrong kind”. Because of their young age, they are not good judges of character and would easily fall victim. They would believe whatever older people would tell them, making them prime targets. Most of the perpetrators and victims were locals.

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The trend of children running away to be with their lovers has prompted police to urge parents to be vigilant of their kids’ activities. Parents must also know where their children hang out most, which Internet cafes, malls or mamak stalls.

Meanwhile, crime analyst Kamal Affendi Hashim said the main factor behind teenagers and children flying the coop was the parents themselves. Some parents are just not ready to raise a family. Many lack parenting skills but refuse to seek help. When a teen goes missing or a child is lured by adults for whatever reason, the fault always lies with the parents.

These youngsters may not have much say at home and, therefore, feel invisible. Most runaway cases happen when a child is not the parents’ favourite, so they seek attention elsewhere.

Parents should seek guidance from their religious leaders if they were unable to seek professional family counselling.

They could also refer to the Welfare Deparrtment for further assistance. Parents and children alike could call Talian Nur (15999) to seek advice if they had family issues.

Know you kid’s friends

MCA Public Services and Complaints Department head, Datuk Michael Chong is all too familiar with cases of missing persons, human trafficking and immigration issues after being the voice of the downtrodden for about 24 years.

He believes the underaged are mostly lured by paedophiles through the Internet. Because of the age gap it is unlikely for these adults to meet children in the open with people around. They would befriend these youngsters on social networking sites such as Facebook.

The adults would send their potential victims gifts to entice them. Knowing that they are having problems at home, it would be easier for the paedophiles to make them victims.

Chong advised parents to know who their children’s friends are and to know those friends personally.

Through the Internet, these children would not know who they are making friends with. The parents should be by their side to monitor them. The children should be allowed to use the Internet but under supervision.     

Paedophilia

Paedophilia  is a psychiatric disorder in adults or late adolescents, usually aged 16 and above, characterised by a primary or exclusive sexual int3erest in prepubescent children aged 13 years and younger.

This disorder brings them to criminal acts such as child sexual abuse, statutory rape and offences involving child pornography, child grooming, stalking and indecent exposure.

Studies by the United Nations Children’s Fund (Unicef) show the most popular tactic used by paedophiles to reach their victims is by “child grooming”.

The groomers usually take an undue interest in someone’s child by being the child’s “special friend” to gain their and their parents’ trust to access them easily.

Besides giving the children gifts and money for no apparent reason, a paedophile would normally show porn videos and pictures too normalize their behaviour, hoping to make it easy for the child to accept such acts. They also talk much about sex.

The groomer might talk about problems usually discussed between adults such as emotional marital problems to establish hugging, kissing or other physical contact with the child.  

Paedophiles also look for opportunities to have time alone with the child by offering to babysit and usually invite the child for sleepovers for a chance to sleep in the same bed. After this normalization process, they will move on to molesting their victim.

After all the grooming, most children would not realize the improper conduct until a third party suspects something amiss.

Unicef studies also confirmed that paedophilia is caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors with paedophiles commonly being victims of violence and sex abuse as children, in a victim-to-perpetrator cycle. If victims are neglected and lack supervision, they become sexual aggressors as adults to accomplish this emotional shift. This shift is then re-targeted back to children simply because they are weaker and pliable.

Although there is no solid cure for apedophilia, treatments are available with the collaboration between law enforcement and health care prosfessionals such as psychiatrists and doctors.

Last year, a local daily reported that a Malaysian was jailed in Singapore for sexual grooming. Poong Foo Yun, 26, had posed as a schoolgirl on a social networking site and cajoled an 11-year-old girl to do indecent acts in front of her 

[Source: The Star}